Her Last Make-Believe Marriage Read online

  After all, everything with Calissa had been so hard.

  He couldn’t believe the woman was still in his mind, but he supposed fiancées were hard to eradicate completely, even after they carved out hearts.

  He still had a heart, he knew. It drummed in his chest, reminding him how much he liked this woman riding with him in the truck. “Here we are,” he said, pulling into the parking lot at the bistro she liked.

  “You’ve never been here?” she asked.

  He peered up at the sign that read District 51. “Nope.”

  “How long have you been at the ranch?” She unbuckled her seat belt and reached for the door handle.

  “Seven years,” he said as she got out. They met at the front of the truck, and Sawyer wondered if he could take her hand right then. Just sort of see how it fit in his, so tomorrow wouldn’t be the first time they touched.

  His throat felt like sand, but he moved his hand toward hers anyway. The moment he touched her, fireworks filled his whole body. Jeri pulled in a breath and met his eyes, and Sawyer seriously considered telling her everything he felt.

  The moment lasted for about two seconds, and then he gained control of his insane desire to spill all his secrets. Some things should stay hidden for a while, and one of those was his small infatuation with this woman.

  They just had a picnic to get through. Then life would go back to normal, and he’d sip coffee on the front porch while she walked down the dirt road to work. That was all. He certainly wasn’t going to have a ranch romance with a woman who wouldn’t be staying long-term.

  Jeri adjusted her hand in his and smiled at him. “They have great beef barbacoa tacos here,” she said. “They have garlic mashed potatoes in them.” Her dark eyes sparkled like diamonds, and Sawyer couldn’t help himself. His resolve to make this a single weekend relationship slipped, and slipped hard.

  “Okay, so my mother’s name is Farrah,” he said the next day, Jeri next to him on the seat again, driving past the welcoming mailbox robot. “Dad is Taylor.” He’d thought of at least a dozen things he should’ve talked about with Jeri at dinner last night.

  He’d completely lost his mind, that was what had happened instead. He let himself think he was on a date with a beautiful woman instead of focusing on prepping her for this family event. And yes, she needed to be prepped.

  “Farrah. Taylor,” she repeated, murmuring something else under her breath.

  “And, joy of joys, I just found out this morning that James has an actual girlfriend.” He glanced at Jeri, his nerves shot and they hadn’t even left town yet. “Like, a real girlfriend, not someone he’s bringing to the picnic to appease our mother.”

  She met his eye, and Sawyer looked away quickly. He felt like she could see right inside him, and while he kind of liked it, he was afraid of what he was telling her.

  “Which means you’re the odd one out again,” she said.

  “Exactly,” he said, his frustration boiling up and touching the back of his brain. He hated feeling like this. “Maybe we should just skip this. It’s just a dumb picnic on the beach.”

  “Obviously not,” she said. “This is a family tradition. A goodbye to summer, right? Didn’t you say you’ve been doing this beach day-slash-picnic since you were a kid?”

  He sighed and looked out his window to check for traffic. “Yeah.”

  “It’ll be fine,” she said. “I’ve had a lot of experience dealing with people.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Oh, yeah,” she said. “Twenty-three years in construction will do that to a person. Foreman, owners, land developers. I’ve sat in more meetings and charmed more people into seeing things my way than I care to admit.”

  He looked at her, and she didn’t seem to be bragging. He wondered if Jeri even could boast about how great she was. She was so…good. So down-to-earth.

  “Anyway,” she said. “I think I can handle your mother.”

  “She’s a special type of person,” Sawyer said, his mood darkening again. “And I should probably tell you why my dad and I don’t get along.”

  “Oh, story time,” she said enthusiastically.

  “Yeah, and then you have to tell me one,” he said. “Anything. Something light and fun.”

  “I think I can do that,” she said.

  “So my dad owns a training company. Horses.” Sawyer took a deep breath, trying to decide if he should go for the long version or the short one. “Basically, he works with the best racehorses in the country. Trains them. Takes care of them when they’re not on the track. That kind of thing. James still works for him. I don’t. That’s about it.”

  “There’s so much more than that,” Jeri said. “But I see what you’re saying. You left the family business.”

  “Right.”

  “When?”

  “Seven years ago.”

  “Ah, so you broke later in life.” She nodded like another piece of the puzzle had fallen into place. “Do you mind me asking why?”

  He did—and he didn’t. Someone else, he might not have wanted to tell. But Jeri was so easy to talk to, he found himself saying, “It wasn’t the lifestyle I wanted. It might seem glamorous, but it was…too fast-paced for me. Too much living in the shadows. Too many half-truths.”

  And there was another thing. “My parents aren’t religious.” He looked at her though he should be watching the freeway ahead of him. “And after I left and came to Last Chance Ranch, I started going to church. I think they….” He exhaled, knowing exactly what they thought, because his dad had shouted it at him five years ago.

  “They think I judge them,” Sawyer said. “I don’t think I do, but there’s that between us too.” He’d seen her go to church with Scarlett and Hudson, so Sawyer felt he could say such things to her.

  Instead of apologizing or saying anything really, Jeri unbuckled her seatbelt and slid across the bench seat until she was thigh-to-thigh with him. The warmth from her body sent shivers right into his bloodstream.

  And when she took his hand in hers, gently curling her fingers between his, she said, “That’s rough, Sawyer.”

  His whole soul lit up, and he squeezed her hand. Emotion made a lump form in his throat, and he couldn’t speak. Thankfully, he could drive with one hand silently, because that was what he did for the next several minutes.

  “I guess I should’ve told you all of this sooner,” he finally said. “You’re sort of stuck coming now.”

  “I want to go,” she said quietly, and if Sawyer could’ve seen her face, he might’ve known more what she was feeling. She inhaled and added, “So I guess it’s my turn. Do you want light and fun or something more along what you just said?”

  “Up to you,” he said, though he was dying to know more about her. Real things. Deep things. Meaningful things that would bond them together, and maybe carry them into a friendship beyond this weekend.

  A real friendship.

  Sawyer hadn’t had a real friend in a while either. Sure, he counted Gramps, who’d hired him seven years ago. He’d done the best he could with the death of his wife, and Sawyer had tried to keep everything afloat himself or by hiring seasonal workers.

  When Scarlett had taken over the ranch, everything had improved drastically, including Sawyer’s quality of life.

  “I’ll do something hard,” she said. “It happened a long time ago, but it’s always there, in the center of my mind.”

  Sawyer waited while she took a few seconds to ready herself to speak.

  “I was married once,” she said, and Sawyer’s heart skipped a beat. “It sort of started out as a joke. I mean, that sounds weird, but yeah.”

  When she didn’t continue, Sawyer asked, “How does a marriage start out as a joke?”

  “Someone said this friend of mine, Howie, couldn’t get anyone to marry him, and I was standing there and said I would. So we did.”

  “Wow.” Sawyer didn’t know what to think. Surely there were finer details to the story—all stories had them—but he’
d just given her the overview of his long-lasting complications with his family.

  “Yeah,” Jeri said. “It was spontaneous, and maybe we didn’t think things through. Especially when I got pregnant.”

  Surprise cut right through Sawyer. “You have kids.”

  “Just one,” she said. “A son.” She grew very quiet, and not just in her voice. She seemed much more subdued in body and spirit, and Sawyer squeezed her hand again.

  “What happened?”

  “Short version—I left. Howie asked me to leave, and I left. He and Randy—my son—live in Eugene now, and neither of them speak to me.”

  Sawyer had no idea what to say. This wasn’t a hard story. Well, it was, but what he’d really classify it as was sad. Heartbreaking.

  “How long?” he asked.

  “Uh, let’s see.” She sighed a long sigh. “I haven’t spoken to Howie in seventeen years. Randy about eight now. He’s twenty.”

  So she was young when she’d had him. Young when she’d spontaneously married someone.

  He didn’t know what to say or do, so he just let his mind work through what it needed to. Without thinking, he lifted her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to the inside of her wrist. “I’m sorry.”

  The words weren’t adequate, and she didn’t answer verbally. She did snuggle into his bicep a bit more, sigh, and close her eyes. Sawyer basked in the warmth from her newfound presence in his life, and he prayed that maybe, just maybe, they could extend their relationship past this picnic.

  Guide me, he prayed. I’ll do what Thou would have me do.

  The truck seemed to have a mind of its own, as if it had driven this road to his parents’ beachfront property before.

  All too soon, Sawyer pulled into the driveway of the mansion where he’d grown up. “All right,” he said, facing the front doors as dread filled his stomach. “We’re here.”

  Chapter 5

  The level of anxiety in Sawyer’s voice wasn’t lost on Jeri. She looked at the house in front of her, though mansion was probably a better term for it. It had two garages, enough to hold four cars, and everything about it screamed wealth.

  So his family had money. Big deal. Jeri had never really cared all that much about money, though she had worked hard to get recognition among a male-dominated career, worked hard to build her business into a reputable one.

  And one mistake—and not even hers—had undone everything she’d scraped and sacrificed to build.

  Her determination to ask him—explain to him the situation she was in—hardened. She hadn’t known what to do after everything had fallen apart, but she was done letting Brenden dictate what she could do with her life.

  “Do we need a code word?” she asked. “You know, in case I get in trouble and need you to come rescue me?”

  He looked at her with a hint of surprise. “Yeah, let’s do that. I may have forgotten to mention how intense my mother is.”

  Jeri giggled, though she had gotten that memo. “So…code word. How about—a”

  “Bird house,” he said. “Easy to work into a conversation. There’s one right there.” He nodded to the designer bird house atop a pole in the flowerbed a few feet from her.

  “Bird house. Got it.” She glanced at the mansion in front of them, feeling overwhelmed by it and wondering what she’d find through the front door. “Should we go in?”

  “I may have forgotten to mention my parents are rich,” he said.

  “It’s just money,” she said. “They’re just people.” She tapped his arm. “Let’s go. I see curtains moving inside, and I think we have a matter of seconds before your mother comes out here to get us.”

  Sawyer turned toward her, his face only a few inches from hers. Everything fell away, and Jeri swallowed, trying to remember the last time she’d kissed a man.

  Brenden.

  The last man she’d kissed was Brenden, and her heart and life and business had been shredded by that man.

  But Sawyer…wasn’t Brenden, and Jeri had no business left to lose.

  He leaned forward, and for half a second, she thought he’d kiss her. He did, but his lips touched her forehead briefly, and he whispered, “Thank you, and I’m going to apologize in advance.”

  He twisted and got out of the truck, turning back to help her down. She kept her hand in his as they walked toward the front doors, which opened before they got there.

  A shriek filled the air that surely belonged to a much younger woman. But no, it was his mother, and she hurried down the steps to embrace Sawyer.

  “Sawwy’s here,” she said, giggling like a schoolgirl. Jeri thought she might have been wrong. Maybe this woman wasn’t just another person.

  She stepped back a couple of feet to give Sawyer room to hug his mother. He held her tight, so he obviously loved her. “Hey, Mom,” he said, almost in a monotone. Their eyes met, and Sawyer rolled his eyes halfway, a smile on his face.

  He cleared his throat and backed out of the embrace. “Mom, this is Jeri Bell.” He indicated her, and Jeri felt every inch of her body as his mother sized her up.

  Sixteen, Jeri wanted to say. I wear a size sixteen.

  She extended her hand, her smile painted in place, and said, “So nice to meet you, Farrah.”

  His mom glanced at Sawyer again before shaking Jeri’s hand. “Are you two together?”

  “Mom,” Sawyer said at the same time Jeri said, “Yes.”

  She refused to look at him. Too many exchanged glances always indicated little white lies, and this one wouldn’t hurt anyone.

  Please don’t let it hurt me, she prayed as his mother released her hand. She could easily see herself dating Sawyer, but she knew it wouldn’t go anywhere.

  She wasn’t interested in a long-term relationship. She didn’t want another husband, or even a boyfriend. So Sawyer was dark and dreamy and made her heart pitter in a way it hadn’t for a while.

  Didn’t mean she wanted a more complicated life than she currently had. She just wanted someone to talk to that wasn’t covered in feathers. To get the job done at Last Chance Ranch. After that, she’d rebuild all she’d lost when Brenden had made a mistake, caused a serious accident, and blamed everything on her.

  So her future wasn’t even at Last Chance Ranch. A relationship with Sawyer couldn’t be long-term. Surely he knew that too. So why was he looking at her with those devastating eyes, that flirty smile on his face?

  Maybe Jeri needed to stop thinking long-term. Maybe she should just enjoy this day with him, get him to lend her his last name, and take it one day at a time.

  She focused on the conversation, especially when a dark-haired woman joined them in front of the house. Clearly Sawyer’s sister, Rosie said, “Come on inside. You’re letting in all the heat.”

  “Yes, let’s go inside,” his mother said, and Sawyer grabbed Jeri’s hand before they followed her up the few steps.

  “Thank you,” he whispered into her hair, and Jeri cuddled right into his side, deciding right then and there to enjoy every minute with him.

  She met his father, and his brother, and his two nephews. It became clear quickly that his mother was the source of all the tension in the room, and almost everyone tiptoed around her.

  Jeri went over to her in the kitchen, where she was putting the finishing touched on the deviled eggs. “Sawyer says you guys did some remodeling in the back yard.”

  Farrah looked up, a hint of surprise in her eyes. “We did. Would you like to see it?”

  “Absolutely,” Jeri said. “I don’t know if Sawyer’s said much about me—we just started dating recently—but I’m a general contractor.”

  Part horror and part shock filled her expression. “Well, isn’t that nice?” Code for That is not nice. Please stop dating my son.

  Jeri smiled at her and tucked her hair behind her ear. “Sawyer says you and Taylor own some horses,” she continued as she followed Farrah around the huge island and out the double French doors to the covered patio.

  “Oh, not
here,” Farrah said, and Jeri paused to take in the huge expanse of the ocean in front of her.

  “This view is amazing,” she gushed, the sunlight glinting on the waves. Sawyer had not mentioned that his parents had beachfront property, just like he’d forgotten to mention the mansion and the money.

  “Isn’t it?” Farrah sighed and cocked her perfect size-six hip while she too gazed out at the ocean. “We have private access, but we won’t go down until we eat.”

  Jeri looked at Farrah, a sliver of self-consciousness squirreling through her. She’d never given much thought to her curves, though she knew she carried a few more pounds than other women.

  “When will we be eating?” she asked.

  “Oh, not for an hour or so,” Farrah said, and Jeri’s hopes dropped all the way to the beach below them.

  She managed to push out a girly laugh anyway, and then Farrah started showing her the new pool and hot tub, the gazebo, and the stepping stones the grandsons had made with their baby hand and footprints in them.

  Farrah could talk, and talk, and talk, which was just fine with Jeri. She accepted the bottle of water Sawyer’s mother offered her from the outdoor kitchen—who needed an outdoor kitchen only thirty feet from their regular kitchen?

  Jeri put on an excellent performance, a little thrill moving through her when Sawyer took her hand again to walk with her down to the beach. His father carried a huge picnic basket, complete with the red checkered blanket.

  Rosie’s husband wheeled the cooler behind them, and everyone else carried a beach chair for themselves. Sawyer carried his and Jeri’s, and she liked his chivalry.

  Blankets got spread out on the sand and food taken out of the basket. The conversation was easy out under the open sky, and the laughter flowed from the little boys and their grandfather.

  Sawyer’s brother had brought his real girlfriend, and James and Peach were friendly and open, while being cute and obviously infatuated with each other. Jeri wondered if she and Sawyer acted that way, and she liked that he brought her food, and sat next to her and held her hand.